dinnerladies

On an otherwise typical Monday morning, Bren's canteen is thrown into crisis when Norman the bread man fails to deliver the granary torpedoes. Should she sign the docket or not? Meanwhile, Jean is preoccupied with planning her daughter's wedding and finding the entertainment. Bren's mother Petula drops in with some ideas, but they're probably not quite right. Tony has to go to the hospital to see how his cancer's going. In the midst of this, Anita's in floods of tears (it's her period), Twinkle can't spell minestrone, and nobody's put out the gravy. New Human Resources person Philippa makes her presence felt, bugging everyone to try some group activities. Scottish country dancing anyone?

There is excitement in the canteen when news of a royal visit to the factory comes through. Nobody's very sure who's coming - Princess Anne doesn't do factories, Prince Edward does theatres - but they're all getting into a flap. When it turns out it's someone called the Duke of Danby, nobody has heard of him, save for Stan, who met him at Catterick years ago. Everyone throws themselves into role play and preparations: Twinkle has to be warned not to say they serve ""arseholes on toast"" and Anita is worried about her nipples popping up. Tony is adamant that the royals aren't speaking to the girls - God help the Duke if he does. When they eventually turn up, Twinkle's struck dumb, Anita says the wrong thing and Stan's devastated that the Duke doesn't remember him. Meanwhile, all the Duke wants is a bit of sex with poor Bren.

Bren's mum, Petula, brings shame on the factory when she acquires a new boyfriend.

Twinkle has something weighing on her mind. In fact, everyone seems to be in a bad mood at the moment, so Philippa attempts to cheer everyone up by breaking the routine.

Everyone is looking forward to this year's Christmas party, which has a Japanese theme.

While Tony is in hospital having treatment, the staff are forced to suffer his formidable replacement.

Friday 9th April 1999: The canteen is being painted over the weekend. But when the decorators arrive early, Bren has to cope with all manner of inconvenience.

Monday 21st June 1999: A bad atmosphere hangs over the canteen as Jean is in a foul mood following her husband Keith's decision to leave her for a Welsh dental hygienist.

Thursday 5th August 1999: Bren is excited by the prospect of going to Marbella with Tony. Meanwhile, Stan and Petula have less reason to be joyful.

Monday 1st November 1999: Tony's holiday photo, the visiting blood donor unit and an escaped prisoner are all contributing factors to Bren's bad day.

Tuesday 21st December 1999: It's nearly Christmas and all Bren's festivities are currently amounting to are three Carry On films and some spaghetti hoops. Meanwhile, the other ladies indulge in a bit of a flutter, and Stan has a bone to pick with Philippa.

Thursday 23rd December 1999: Bren's past has caught up with her and it looks as though she and Tony are off the menu as far as romance is concerned, causing her to contemplate handing her notice in.