Two and a Half Men

Carefree jingle writer Charlie Harper has his lifestyle altered when his uptight brother and his 10-year-old nephew move in with him.

Despite warnings from Charlie, Jake continues to feed seagulls on the deck and the birds invade the house. Meanwhile, Charlie thinks Judith is taking advantage of Alan, who keeps going to her house to fix things.

Jake wants to go home to his mom after he gets sick, prompting Alan to think he's a failure as a husband and now as a father.

Charlie can't function when his housekeeper storms off because of Alan's constant complaints, so Alan tries desperately to woo her back. Meanwhile, Rose comes to Charlie for dating advice.

Alan and Charlie have encounters with some highly libidinous soccer moms, but with two very different outcomes.

The guys go to Evelyn's house to meet the new man she's dating, and Charlie realizes the man's daughter is a woman he's trying to avoid.

Alan learns that Charlie belongs to an exclusive men's group, and he begs his brother to let him join.

Judith is dating Jake's pediatrician, and Alan is upset until Charlie points out that if she remarries, his alimony payments will end.

Charlie tries to save Jake from school suspension for giving his teacher (Missi Pyle) the finger by romancing her, but his several attempts fail every time.

Jake is very impressed and can't stop talking about his mother's new boyfriend, Dr. Melnick, which annoys Alan. While Evelyn borrows Charlie's car to help her impress a Saudi prince, because she wants to sell him real estate. When Charlie gets his car back, he discovers his mother's bra in the backseat. When he finds out why it's there he decides to trade in his car.

Charlie meets his match when he falls for a woman who's better at playing hard to get than he is.

Alan denies having shoplifted a toy as a child and fears he has a dark side, until Charlie admits he planted the toy on Alan to stay out of trouble himself.

After falling off the roof, Alan needs Charlie's help in looking after Jake, which interferes with Charlie's social life.

Jake gets suspended from school after drawing an offensive picture of a girl in his class that has large breasts. Meanwhile, Charlie is asked to watch over Alan's chiropractic office after pulling an all-nighter.

Alan has been dating a lot, and Charlie soon finds out that it has been one woman - his ex-wife, Judith. He tries to stop Alan, and even brings Rose, Evelyn and Berta to interfere - but Alan ignores them all.

Berta causes tension between Charlie and Alan, when she temporarily moves in with them

Charlie learns he can't be in a long-lasting relationship, becuase of unresolved issues he has with his mother. Jake asks Charlie for advice about a girl at school.

Ignoring Alan's warnings, Charlie continues to date Isabella until she threatens to put a curse on his manhood.

Charlie returns to his bachelor lifestyle after Alan moves out of the house. Alan suffers a breakdown after his divorce from Kandi.

Charlie finally tells Alan that he didn't marry Mia because she wanted Alan and Jake to move out of the house, but Alan finds a hole in his logic. Charlie and Alan deal with a noisy neighbor who constantly sings all the time, who happens to be Steven Tyler.

Charlie tries to surf to impress Dottie, a beautiful woman he just met, but after he nearly drowns he is convinced that he saw his late father.

Alan tries to hire his ex-wife's lawyer to help him win custody over the dog he and Kandi shared.

Alan is overjoyed by the prospect of Judith remarrying, as he would no longer have to pay alimony. Alan gets Charlie to help him when it looks like the marriage maybe derailed due to Jake’s dislike of his mother’s fiancé.

Charlie is dating a woman whose personality and life are like his mother’s.

Jake is getting ready to start a new school as he graduates to Junior High. Alan and Charlie take him school shopping and find themselves in trouble.

Charlie acts strange after spending an evening with his mother, and a woman Alan slept with behaves oddly the next morning.

Alan convinces Charlie that he needs to date more respectable women and sets him up with a judge. The two double date and their waitress happens to be one of Charlie’s ex-girlfriends. Charlie's date backfires the following morning, when he ends up in court in front of the judge.

Charlie and Linda get closer to consummating their relationship, but Charlie has trouble focusing when he begins to see Rose's face everywhere he turns.

Charlie has to come up with ways to keep his girlfriend's 4-year-old amused; Alan becomes a test subject.

Charlie's girlfriend is embrassed to go out in public with him. Meanwhile, Jake sneaks out to attend a concert.

In the 6th season opener, Charlie runs into an ex-girlfriend and a child who bears a striking resemblance to Charlie.

Charlie borrowed money from Alan and on the day he is supposed to pay him back, Alan goes to ask Charlie for the money. He again finds Charlie in bed with a beautiful woman. After Charlie shoos him out and assures him he'll get the money for him later that day, the woman asks if Charlie is really out of cash and Charlie tells her not to worry, that he has plenty of hooker money.

Alan, Jake, and Charlie all decide to try new things: Alan is dating more than one woman, Charlie learns to cook, and Jake experiments with beer.

Alan is sure that things will turn bad when Charlie starts dating his receptionist.

Charlie tries to help Jake's former teacher, who became a stripper after dating him, but things go from bad to worse when she has a religious conversion.

When Judith kicks Herb to the curb, Alan comes knocking; Jake is sent to stay with a less-than-willing Charlie for three months during Judith's meltdown.

Charlie must make a difficult decision about his future and with which woman he wants to spend his life: Chelsea or Mia.

When Chelsea convinces Charlie to let Alan's new girlfriend, Melissa, move in, the girls end up taking over Charlie's house.

Alan ends up playing maid to Judith's new baby as well as his former mother-in-law. Meanwhile, Jake uses an incriminating photo to blackmail Charlie.

Alan starts working for Evelyn as Charlie works to fix the relationship between Chelsea and Jake.

Jake stops at nothing to get away from Charlie and Alan, after they embarrass him out in public.

Alan's advice to Chelsea that she get breast-reduction surgery is not met with enthusiasm by Charlie, who kicks him out, but staying with Evelyn has its own challenges.

When Jake finds out that Alan has been dating Eldridge's mom, he packs up and heads to Judith and Herb's. Meanwhile, Charlie decides it's time to cut back on boozing.

Charlie is willing to do anything for Alan to accept Lyndsey's offer to move in with her.

After moving in with Lyndsey, Alan continues to have a rendezvous with Melissa at Charlie's house.

Lyndsey and Eldridge move into Charlie's house after their home burns down.

Alan pretends to be Charlie when he goes out on the town; Charlie sneaks off for cosmetic surgery.

Charlie has difficulty dealing with dating a slightly older woman.

Alan and Jake meet Walden Schmidt, a broken-hearted billionaire.

Walden deals with his ex-wife, Bridget.

Alan prepares Walden for a date with Bridget, while Jake decides to emulate Walden and drop out of school.

Walden goes looking for Mrs. Right while Alan has an opportunity to reconcile with Lyndsey.

Alan has trouble accepting Lyndsey's seedy movie past, and Walden tries to cheer him up by throwing a party.

Walden receives divorce papers from Bridget, but forgets his depression when he meets a girl who looks eerily like her.

Walden plans a big surprise for Zoey's birthday.

Zoey and Walden break up, causing Walden to experience a breakdown.

Alan and Lyndsey decide to spice things up in the bedroom.

Walden starts to feel his age when a friend's daughter comes to town.

Despite Alan's warnings, Walden starts dating Rose.

Walden must choose between Zoey and Rose.

Charlie's 25-year-old daughter arrives at the beach house, hoping to get to know her family.

Jenny moves in with Evelyn and her wealthy boyfriend, Marty (Carl Reiner).

Walden and Alan think it may be time for Berta to retire when she injures her back at work. When they suggest her retiring, she grows offended, and as the conversation progresses she quits. Walden and Alan then try different maids, with little success.

Alan and Lyndsey's illicit relationship becomes jeopardized when one of Lyndsey's man-hunting friends, Stephanie (Jennifer Aspen), asks if they are back together. The two staunchly deny it, then Lyndsey insists that Alan make a date with Stephanie so that she will believe their lie. Alan meets her for an uncomfortable date, which nevertheless leads to sex, causing Lyndsey to get mad and leave Alan again.

Alan tries to find out what Lyndsey's boyfriend has over him; Walden helps Jenny pursue her acting career.

When Alan learns Walden knows Lynda Carter, he asks him to set him up on a date with her. Against his better judgment, Walden agrees to invite her to the house for dinner.

After a health scare on Halloween, Walden decides he needs to change his life.

Alan has second thoughts about getting married after he's asked to sign a pre-nup.

Alan and Walden have a meeting with an adoption social worker that hinges on them being convincing as a loving couple. Lyndsey returns after 60 days in rehab.

A birth mother considers having Walden and Alan adopt her baby.

Walden becomes a foster parent to a 6-year-old boy, but worries about himself when they don't hit it off like he hoped.

Alan breaks Walden's rules when he realizes that Louis thinks he's cool, and he wants it to stay that way.